Parenting is already a bit of a rollercoaster (hello, snack negotiations and bedtime standoffs), and when your child has a stoma bag, it just adds a few extra loops to the ride. But here’s the good news, you can help your child grow up feeling strong, confident, and totally at ease with who they are.

If you’re on this journey, take a deep breath and know this: You’re doing an incredible job. And your child? They’re already a rockstar. Now, let’s talk about some ways to make sure they feel supported, understood, and ready to take on the world.

Keep It Real: Talk Openly About Their Stoma

No need to tiptoe around the topic! Help your child feel like their stoma bag is just another part of them, like freckles or curly hair. The more you normalise it, the more confident they’ll feel. Let them ask questions, share their thoughts, and own their story.

Bonus Tip: Keep it light and positive. Maybe even give the stoma a fun nickname if that helps your kid feel more at ease.

Embrace the “Different”

Every kid wants to fit in, but the truth is, being different is a superpower. Help your child see their stoma as just one cool part of their story, not the whole story. They’re an artist, an athlete, a scientist-in-the-making, oh, and they happen to have a stoma. No biggie.

Bonus Tip: Introduce them to inspiring role models, people who own their uniqueness with confidence. Whether it’s a celeb, an athlete, or someone in your own community, seeing others shine can help your child do the same.

Teach Them to Be the Boss of Their Stoma

Knowledge is power, and that includes knowing how to take care of a stoma bag. Giving your child age-appropriate responsibility for their own care makes them feel more in control and less like their stoma is something that just happens to them.

Bonus Tip: Start small. Maybe they help check their bag or pick out fun pouch covers. The goal? Help them feel like their stoma care is just another part of their routine.

Make Life Feel “Business as Usual”

Spoiler alert: Your kid can still do so many of the things they love. Movie nights? Absolutely. Playdates? For sure. Baking cookies, dressing up, building blanket forts? All on the table. Their stoma bag doesn’t have to be the main character—it’s just part of the background, not the whole story.

Bonus Tip: Find comfy, confidence-boosting clothes. When they feel good in what they’re wearing, it’s easier for them to focus on fun, not what’s underneath.

Teach Them to Bounce Back Like a Champ

Let’s be real, some days will be tough. Maybe they feel self-conscious, or maybe someone asks an awkward question. That’s okay! The key is helping them build emotional resilience so they can shake off the hard moments and keep being their awesome self.

Bonus Tip: Create a “feel-good” toolkit for rough days. Maybe it’s a pep-talk playlist, a journal, or a code word they can use to let you know they need extra support.

Be Their #1 Hype Squad

You know that ridiculously over-the-top energy sports fans have? Channel that for your kid. Let them know they’re amazing, stoma bag and all. Cheer them on when they crush a new skill, stand by them when they’re feeling down, and remind them that they are so much more than their medical condition.

Bonus Tip: If they run into teasing or bullying, help them craft some rock-solid comebacks. “Oh, this? It’s my super-secret power pack. What’s your superpower?” And if anything comes up, have a chat with their teacher or school principal.

Help Them Find Their People

Friends who accept them for who they are? Priceless. Encourage them to find kind, supportive buddies who see them beyond their stoma bag. Whether it’s through school, hobbies, or online communities, knowing they’re not alone makes a world of difference.

Bonus Tip: Look for online or in-person support groups where they can connect with other kids who “get it.” Sometimes, just knowing someone else has a stoma too can make a huge impact.

Try To Educate Others

Sometimes, people just don’t know, and that’s okay! If your child is comfortable, helping others understand their stoma can turn awkward moments into teaching moments. And who knows? They might inspire someone else to be more open-minded and inclusive.

Bonus Tip: A simple, “It helps my body do what it needs to do” is often enough to satisfy curious minds. No pressure for a full TED Talk, unless they want to give one, in which case, go for it!

Confidence is the Goal

At the end of the day, your child is amazing, just as they are. Their stoma is one part of them, but it doesn’t define them. With love, support, and a sprinkle of humour, they can grow up knowing that they’re strong, capable, and worthy of every bit of joy life has to offer.

So keep cheering them on, keep making space for their feelings, and most of all, keep reminding them (and yourself!) that they’ve got this under control.



Disclaimer: This article is for general informational purposes only and doesn’t replace medical advice. Every child is different, and what works for one may not work for another. For personalised guidance on stoma care or your child’s health, please speak with a qualified healthcare professional.